ebs 美樂顧問 - 打造全球移動力！

Common mistakes in business email writing 

許多學員常常在寫business email的時候，就是頭痛的時刻。。。。。。。。

"..xxoooxxx.......... 該怎麼說呢?"

"這樣寫對嗎?"

"如何能把我想說的事情表達完全?"

聽到外師最常苦口婆心 "規勸" 學員的一句話是: 大家想複雜了, 用簡單的句子表達就很清楚了!

在這裏綜合一些實際案例, 供大家參考~

Example 1: My weekly report was accidently threw to the trash can.

中文原意: 我不小心把我的報告丟到垃圾箱了.

• Overuse of passive verbs that hides the identity of the doer.

• Incorrect use of verb tense, confused by the past and past perfect tense.

• Improper use of preposition that failed to describe exactly what happened.

Correction: (active) I accidently threw away my weekly report in the trash can.

Correction: (passive) My weekly report was accidently thrown away in the trash can.

Example 2: After using product, please place safe location. Do not place next the flammable object / easy melt object / explosion object.

中文原意: 使用本產品後, 請將銲桿放在安全位置, 不可放在易燃物 / 易熔物 / 爆炸物旁.

• Failed to identify the noun in specific term.

• Missing article, the or a, can't tell what is what and where is where.

• Missing preposition, readers don't know where to put the product.

• Missing object, confused readers what to do.

• Missing conjunctions and separator punctuation to make the sentence readable.

• incorrect usage of adjective and adverb. Use adverb to describe an action (verb) and adjective to describe a noun.

Correction: After using the soldering iron, please place it at a safe location. Do not place it near (or next to) a flammable,  easily melting, or explosive object.

Example 3: Regarding the STI for the regulations for Taiwan, we asked all of doctor and the government.

中文原意: 有關台灣對於幹細胞移植的規定, 我們已經詢問過相關醫師和政府負責機構.

• When using an abbreviation for a specific, seldom seen terminology, it is better to spell it out at least once at the beginning of the letter.

• Improper sequence of wording.

• Missing plural identified.

• Need to be more specific when describe an organization handling the matter.

Correction: Regarding the regulations of the Stem Cell Implant (STI) in Taiwan, we have inquired the doctors researching this topic and the Food and Drug Administration (or government agency in charge). 

Example 4: We hope you will reply to us ASAP. Your response we will be gratitude.

中文原意: 我們盼望您盡快回覆, 感謝不盡.

• Too complicated writing, need to be clear to the point.

• Incorrect use of word (noun) where requires verb in proper tense.

Correction: Your prompt reply will be appreciated.

Example 5: Please help us to be affixed warning label in the product cover.

中文原意: 請協助我們把警告標示貼於產品之外蓋.

• Improper use of passive verb where active is better.

• Incorrect use of preposition.

Correction: Please help us affix the warning label on the product cover.

Example 6: This case that I have been told my manager.

中文原意: 這個案子我已經和我的經理談論過了.

• Confusing verb tense where straight forward sentence is desired.

Correction: I have discussed this case with my manager.

Example 7: We has decided to seek locally factory help.

中文原意: 我們已經決定尋求本地工廠協助.

• Incorrect usage of conjugations.

• Confused usage of adverb with adjective, local is to describe factory, not seek.

Correction: We have decided to seek helps from the local factories (or a local factory). 

Example 8: We just want to be describing fact and hoping the manufacturer could made the label to us.

中文原意: 我們希望說明實情, 希望廠商能夠為我們製作標示.

• Improper use of verb to be and verb tense.

• Incorrect use of preposition.

Correction: We just want to describe the fact and hope the manufacturer could make the label for us.

是不是並没有想像中那麼的困難呢!?

你也有寫 business email 上的困擾嗎? 歡迎 留言 或 寄信至 info@ebs-education.com 信箱. EBS 將會為你解惑哦!

(圖片轉自網路)